also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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