You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
