I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
