So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
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