Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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