Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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