there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I would ride that face into the sunset
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
