Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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