Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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