Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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