dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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