Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
