she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Ambien. No doubt about it.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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