ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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