When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
