that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize