I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
