so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
