What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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