just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
