It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
