dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
The best revenge is premature balding
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Randomize
