She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
