I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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