Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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