this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
is it fun? or sober?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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