i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
even my farts smell like vagina
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
