if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize
