I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
