the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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