I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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