fuck your aforementioned shoe
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
