So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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