never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
