question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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