I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
