While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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