Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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