It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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