We're facebook friends in real life
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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