Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
