I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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