I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
