did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
