Porn is love you can see.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Randomize
