Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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