called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
