Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
