Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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