Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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