omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize