brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
